#8. Five important things.

I'm back from my busy week with the 30 day blogging challenge. Find out more about it here! I really don't want to make this one long. I did that for the last question lol. 
8)      Five things that are most important to you in a future mate

1. Faith. It's important that my future "better half" shares the most important thing to me, and that's my faith. It's not easy melding two lives into one anyway, but I believe it's much more doable when two people can agree on God.
2. Grounded. I can't explain this except to say, there is a confidence and just something really attractive about a guy that is grounded. This possibly comes from the fact that I'm really kinda flighty and all over the place, the ability to take (most) things as they come is one that I'd like to learn myself actually. 
3. Leadership qualities are important to me, because a leader (versus a boss) doesn't have to yell and scream, people just automatically follow the guide. 
4 Empathy. I think it's important that people be able to see both sides of a story. Empathy doesn't mean that you don't see what someone has done wrong, but it does mean that you see how being a human could cause them to make the mistake...That goes a long way toward someone who is gentle and merciful. 
5. Laughter. I love to laugh, the Bible backs me up with David (or was it Solomon) saying that laughter works like a medicine. I don't by any means want a silly man, but maybe someone who enjoys laughter and happiness. A person like that can't be too bad! 

Disclaimer: I didn't put the outward things that appeal to me for a reason, this is the top five most important things on short notice. Looks are important, but they make the top ten :-)

Fall Blog Linky Party!

Fall is here, and we're quickly heading toward winter! Naturally, when I think of Fall, my first thought is allergies, my second is fall fashions, and my third is tasty fall treats hot from the kitchen! I'm going to show you a few of the fall fashion trends that have me rubbing my hands together with anticipation!

Ankle Boots

Two words that should have you completely send you into raptures! Find them everywhere shoes are sold! Since I didn't have any in my closet that weren't falling apart, I remedied that by buying some online! 

Scarves

Hello, do they ever go out of style? Not in my book! Fall colors are my year round colors. Find ones that look great with your skin. To find "your color" find some natural light and hold the fabric up to your face. You don't want to look pink all over, or like me, have the greenish tint brought out that you didn't even know you had. 

Headband/Ear-Warmers

I don't know that these are trending, but I know that they should be...And that even if they aren't, I will be wearing them. There are a plethora to choose from on Etsy too! 

What must-have fashions will you be wearing when you sit with your warm cup of apple cider? 

Don't forget to check out Mechelle's blog, Rita's blog, and Judy's blog for more fall posts! 

#7. Where you thought you'd be.

This blog challenge is becoming more and more of a challenge...Yet I still want you to join me! Check it out here.

7)      Where you are in your life vs. where you thought you would be at this point

When I was in college, I took my College Success class seven months into school. Yeah, I tried to find a way to get out of it, but they wouldn't let me. The teacher in that class was phenomenal basically, but that's a story for another day. To give us a little insight into what our dreams were and how much we'd actually planned versus just dreamed, our professor gave us an assignment: Write a 15-year plan. First he taught us what a goal really is; as it turns out, a goal has a time-frame, and a goal is attached to a detailed plan for how you will accomplish it. Therefore this plan was going to be very intense, with the year beside every thing we were going to do and be in the future.

Let's just say I'm way "off track". 

According to my 15-year plan, I am supposed to be running a successful design business and meeting for lunch with friends from college to discuss how fabulous life is. I imagined I would chuckle as I talked about my kids and blush as I mention my (extra hot) husband. No, I didn't mention blushing or chuckling in my plan-it was very professional-but this extensive brain-wracking and planning didn't keep me from daydreaming!

Reality: I am currently living at home, my business is not self-sustaining (yet), my husband hasn't arrived, thankfully no kids have either though, and I hardly keep in touch with any friends from college! I feel sorta embarrassed sometimes, and catch myself trying to catch glimpses of my peers grass to see whether it has patches like mine does. But I also didn't put in my 15-year plan that I would have a dashing and intelligent young nephew and three beautiful nieces, three brother-in-laws that I like, a sister whose house I sleep in almost as often as my own, or the closeness that has grown between my mom and me in the years since I've finished college. I didn't know to write that I would home school my younger sisters and gain such a confidence from it. I also neglected to write about the relationships that would test me, and that I would come out of a wiser woman. 

Yeah, I'm so off track. 

Thank God. 

There is no point in regret over things in my past that have taught me lessons I couldn't have learned otherwise! I've spent too much time already looking back at how I shouldn't have done something foolish when I was younger, rather than how now I'll be able to instruct my younger sisters from experience. There are too many close bonds now and in my future that I wouldn't have if I didn't learn personally the type of people I don't want to be around. 

I'm nowhere near where I thought I'd be. 

I'm right where I'm supposed to be. 

Join me and tell your story!

Number 6: Every woman has the love life she wants.

6)      Sound off on the quote “Every woman has the exact love life she wants”
So we're at it again. My strategy for answering this question is to just start typing whatever pops into my head lol. I literally feel speechless right now though. I'll try to picture someone saying that to me: "Every woman has the exact love life she wants". I'm sure at first I would be like "No. No..." But then I'm conflicted. When it comes down to it I can't speak for every woman. On this statement I can barely speak for myself! I think I have the exact love life that I want. Wanna know why? Because I chose to be single. I could be in a relationship with Mr. Right now (vs mr. Right) if that was what I wanted, but I decided it wasn't. Women are known for changing their minds; they can change what they want or accept in any part of their lives. The love life I want for now is one that includes me and God, me and my family, me and my friends--that kind of love. It's different, but it's the only love I feel ready for right now. Honestly my life (and love life) are what I want for now. 
Join me by commenting or leaving a link to your reply to this quote! See what started all this here. 

Til next time,
Lizzi

#5 The biggest misconception about singles

5)      The biggest misconception you think people have about single life.

There are so many misconceptions about single life! I hardly know where to start! 

I feel as if the biggest misconception about single life is that "we" have all the time in the world for...Well...Whatever! Married and coupled people seem to think that single people are not busy. "Girl, if you don't have a boyfriend or husband to take care of, what are you doing?" The answer is everything. If I'm single, I really need to be on my roll before someone comes along to change my focus! I've never been as productive as when I've been single! 

Along with the things church related, I'm busy with my sisters' schooling, piano lessons (though I'll clearly never be truly amazing at it), exercising with my mom, planning home improvement (also with mom), and the business I'm trying to get off the ground...All that not including the fun stuff!

So, I've told you what the misconception is, now let me sum up what single life really is. It is a time (some choose it to be a lifetime) to go after your goals and dreams, to enjoy the small things, make close bonds, and yes, sometimes even learn about heartache. If you're planning on being married one day, it's the time to prepare for married life. Most of the time, we are happy to help out or babysit children--of course I'm only speaking for myself-but it's difficult not to be resentful when you act as if it's the only thing we have to do in life. 

So, single people, weigh in here! What do you think is the biggest misconception people have about single life? 

#4. The scariest thing about being single

So we are moving right along! Click the picture for the info on this challenge!

4)      Your biggest fear as a single person.
The main part of this challenge is to be real with the answers...Which means I have to dig deep. This isn't something that I really think about. No one wants to focus on their fears, where's the fun in that? 
At first I thought my biggest fear was never getting married and having kids, but I think my real fear is that I won't be happy with wherever my life leads. I know a few people who never got married and are really content; I know more people who (especially right around my age) started becoming desperate to get married or at least be in a relationship. We generally live the first fifteen years of our lives single, so why the fear that we'll never have something we were born without? 

To clarify, I believe that dreaming of the fairy tale "happily ever after" is a good thing, and even a God-given desire-as long as it doesn't become the only desire. I definitely have that desire, and would love to have all the fun I have now doubled by having someone to share it with; however, I don't want my main goal to be something I have no control over. I refuse to get married just in case I won't find happiness alone. I sometimes feel like I'm a strange specimen for being happy the majority of the time without a man. I have so many things to keep me busy, inspired, and content. I don't want that to wear off. I fear it wearing off! The good news is that talking about your fears is the first step to overcoming them...Here's hoping!

Join me on the 30 day blogging challenge, or comment with your answer to any (or all) of the questions! 

#3. A moment or a day when being single was really awesome.

And we continue on...
The Single Woman's 30 day blogging challenge.

3)      Describe a moment or a day when being single was really awesome.
Ah, so here we are at a good memory. My sister told me my last post made her sad lol. She doesn't ordinarily read my blog, but she was told (by me) that she was in it and wanted to make sure that she was put in a good light.
Now for the answer: As a person, single or married, I hope that there are always plenty of good days and moments, that's why it's difficult to pick only one. I think it would be easier to pick a time when it would have been good to be single and I wasn't lol. I'm going to go with the trip to NC in 2010. I don't remember what led up to it, or even any planning, but one day my friend Taylor and I decided to head up to the North Carolina a few hours away. We agreed that we would stop at any little shop or stop that interested us, and that's what we did. We had sandwiches at cute cafes and yummy coffee drinks from a java shop off a little mountain road...and the antique shops and boutiques we stopped at-Mm! We visited Taylor's sweet aunt, and ironically, when we got to her house after dinner the heavens opened up and poured out rain. The forecast was pretty formidable, so what we had planned as a day trip, turned into an overnight trip. I slept on the couch and it felt adventurous like sleepovers do when you're a child. The ride back was as fun as the ride there with lots of "deep conversation" and coffee. 

What's is your favorite single moment memory?

I was quite the chubs lol

As always, click the link (at the top) and check out the challenge. You may want to join! 

#2. A moment when being single sucked.

As you know I'm doing the 30 day blogger challenge (please click the link if you want to check it out.) I'm gonna get right to this painful one lol.

2)      Describe a moment or a day when being single really sucked.
Immediately after reading this question, I knew the moment/day. All three of my (biological) sisters are married, and two live out of town. For my mom's birthday, they decided to visit so we could have a big "to-do". One day, all my sisters and their husbands were here at the house. We were all talking and laughing loudly, and I looked around; there were four happy couples! My parents and my sisters and brothers-in-law were all blessed with wonderful happy relationships. I suddenly felt adrift and in limbo. It was the worst feeling, because I rarely feel as if there is a hole in my life. Of course I have those single girl moments (usually I'm watching a fine movie star on a favorite show) where I say "It would be cool to have a man" or I'll jokingly say to a friend, "Okay, I need a man." but there is never a true sense of urgency. For once, I realized that my sisters could all relate to each other on a different level while I was/am at a different place.
That moment sucked because I wanted to have what my sisters had and I realized that it was one thing I couldn't just have when I wanted it. I know I could be married right now, or be in a relationship with some guy...But having a good relationship or a good marriage isn't so easily acquired. Although, at that "sucky moment" I was surrounded by happy couples, I've seen unhappy or even just bored couples and I'm not at all willing to give up even the suckiest moments of single life for that. So here I am, willing to take those less-than-stellar moments with the shining glorious moments of singleness, and prepare myself for one day enjoying married life, or forever enjoying single life. 

Tell me, what was your suckiest moment of being single?

#1 Why are you still single?

I've decided to do this 30 day challenge for singles that I saw on Mandy's (the single woman) blog. Some of the questions are difficult...And personal, but maybe that's what I need. After all, no one reads my posts anyway lol.
If you'd like to join in, click the link above and check out the "rules". Embarrassing things like this are meant to be shared! I think that sometimes it's good to get out of your comfort zone, and answering questions and putting those answers into words is a good way to find out more about yourself.
Let's get started!

1)      Your response to everyone’s favorite question: “And why are YOU still single?”
Because the one hasn't come along yet! Okay, so cliche. I've not been in a whole ton of relationships...Mainly because you can't call it that if the guy you're in it with doesn't acknowledge you publicly as his girlfriend or seems embarrassed to. To me, being with someone doesn't make you not single. I've been my loneliest when I've been in a relationship. 

Get to the point Lizzi...

I'm single because I won't be okay with okay. I almost was several times, but it is lame to accept something that I don't even want to be. Shouldn't I expect the same of others that I want to be myself? I want to be standout, extraordinary; therefore, I want standout and extraordinary. 

So there it is. Not the most eloquent answer to that simple question, but that's what I came up with. 

Next question?

Flea market ice cream?

You already know that when it comes to yard sales and (especially) flea markets, I'm all up in it! A full year after I found this ice cream/frozen yogurt maker at a flea market (in it's very ancient looking box with instructions), we finally made some ice cream! Quick plug for the Children's home sale where I bought this. Please check out the site, and they have another sale coming up soon! Do it for the kids!

We get very ripe fruit at a discounted rate at an open farmer's market, so my mom pulled out some mango she'd frozen and voila! Mango ice cream! I was a little fascinated by the process as you can see...

And let's conclude these examples of my less than great photography skills, by showing the finished product:

Lizzi